Ben is a month old already!!

It’s hard to believe that Ben has already been with us for a full month!  Although, looking back, it’s been a pretty “interesting” month, to say the least.  I have decided that I’m really not that big of fan of the “newborn” stage.  Don’t get me wrong.  I love Ben to death and wouldn’t trade him for the world, but I do not function well on little sleep.  I am a night owl, but by that, I mean I stay up until midnight most nights.  Ben’s version of being a night owl was at first to scream bloody murder from about 1am – 3am, and then he transitioned into the “won’t sleep by himself in his own bed from 4am-8am” stage, which is where we currently are.  Newborns cry a lot, and Ben has done his fair share of that, but his cry is much more “muted” than Abbie’s was, so it’s much easier to tolerate.  When Abbie cried, you could, no kidding, hear her outside and 2 houses over when she was this age.  Ben does more fussing than full on screaming, and even when he does get worked up, he just sounds like a grumpy old man.  It’s pretty cute.

Abbie is doing much better now that she’s had a month to adjust, thank God.  For a while there I was really wondering what the heck I’d gotten myself into with having two kids.  But Abbie is doing better and her meltdowns aren’t nearly as frequent as they were.  She constantly asks to hold Ben and she loves to help with him.  I’ll be holding him and she’ll come up and say “Give him to me.", like I’ll just pass him off to her.  I have no doubt she’d try to carry him around if I gave her half the chance.  Instead, I let her “carry” his feet when I carry him around.  He’s pretty tolerant of her being in his face and being a little bit rough at times.  Ben loves to watch Abbie and many times he’ll calm down if she starts to talk to him when he’s worked up.  She loves to give him his paci and put blankets on him when he’s in his swing.

I had lunch with Brittney today, who’s a nurse at the clinic on base, and she did a quick weight check on him for me.  (Thanks Britt!!)  He was 10lbs1oz with his clothes and diaper on.  So we guesstimated that he probably weighs around 9lbs 13oz without his clothes on, which means he’s up a full pound from his 2 week appointment.  I don’t doubt he’s getting enough to eat at all, which is a huge difference from when Abbie was this age.  I was constantly worried about my milk supply with her, but I’m not worried about it this time, mostly because I feel like I have enough milk for 3 babies most of the time.  I leak quite a bit, and I flood him sometimes when I’m nursing him.  Some nights we give him two ounces of formula in a bottle so he will drink from a bottle later on and also take formula when we’re out and about.  Makes my life a lot easier, but I’ve noticed I’m not nearly as self-conscious about nursing him when we’re out in public as I was with Abbie.  Ben doesn’t nurse nearly as much as Abbie did though.  Abbie used me as a pacifier half the time, but when Ben is done eating, he doesn’t want me to nurse him any more and wants his paci back.  Abbie was latched on to me pretty much the first 4 months of her life straight.

Just in the past week Ben has become easier.  He’s much more alert now and he’ll watch me as I move around and turn to look at you when you talk to him.  He’ll be perfectly content sitting in his swing or bouncy chair just watching what everyone else is doing for about 15 mins at a time.  He doesn’t cry as much in the evenings like he used to.  And we’re trying to get him to go to sleep by himself instead of us holding him and then trying to get him in bed without him waking up.  We learned that lesson with Abbie.  He definitely gets fussy when he gets tired so I usually nurse him if he wants to nurse, or we rock him until he’s drowsy and then try to put him in the bed while he’s still somewhat awake.  Usually he’ll wake up and cry when we put him down, but we just pat him and keep putting his paci in his mouth until he falls asleep.  Last night was our best night yet!  He slept from 12am-4:15am.  I nursed him from 4:15am-5am.  And then I put his paci in at 5:15am and 6:30am, and he stayed in his bed until 7:30am.  It was REALLY nice not spending most of the night in the chair.

And just to keep up the tradition, here are the Ben and weina dog pictures.  Some people measure their kid’s growth by having them hold stuffed animals in pictures (great idea!).  We’re the weirdos that put them next to the weina dogs.  (Sadie wasn’t a big fan of his screaming.)

Our little stud striking a pose.

Love them!!

Still here

I’ve had a few requests from friends to put more pictures of Ben up on here.  I had my camera set to take pictures in RAW format, and then discovered I couldn’t post pictures on here in RAW format, so I’m still trying to get those other pictures converted.  But here are a few pictures that I’ve taken in the past few days.  I’m not going to talk about him too much, because he’ll be a month old tomorrow and I’ll give all the updates in that blog.

But just to tide you over until I find the time to get that post up, here are a few pictures of our little Ben.

 

And here are a few of the pooks eating cookies.

5QF

1. What is the weather like where you are and do you like it?  It’s been fairly nice here.  In the 50’s and sunny, although we did have a storm last night.  I don’t mind the weather, but I do miss snow, especially for Christmas.  At least we can see snow on the mountains.

2. When you're sick what do you seek comfort from?  My bed and a book or lots of sleep.  And ibuprofen.

3. What do you need to do before the end of the month?  Figure out how to parent 2 kids by myself since my husband is leaving for a few weeks for work.  I have to admit, I’m pretty nervous about it because it’s been a HUGE adjustment for Abbie since Ben was born.  She’s a bit more than a handful at times.  Wish me luck!

4. Have you ever served on a jury?  Nope, not yet!

5. If you could be any animal, what would you be and why?  I think a horse, because I think they’re beautiful and majestic, and I would like to know how it is for them doing dressage and jumping like we make them do.  It would be interesting to experience it from there point of view.

December 2011 Abbie-isms

**Abbie was ordering Mark around and he wasn’t doing what she was telling him to do.  Finally she said, “Daddy, you’re driving me nuts!”  HAHA!  I suppose she’s heard that a time or two…

**We were in the BX yesterday and we walked by the bra/underwear section.  Abbie starts pointing at the bras and said, “Mommy, those are boob pads.”  I kept walking and muttered, ‘Uh-huh.  Come on Abbie.” hoping she would just keep following me.  Nope.  She didn’t.  She turned around and ran back to them and then yelled, since I was 20 ft away from her, “Mommy!!  Boobs go in these!  They’re boob pads!!”  *sighs*  I went back to get her and told her they were called bras, not boob pads, so as we were walking away she said, “Oh, they’re called bras.”  I would love to see how Mark would react if she did this stuff when he was around.  He’d ironically disappeared when all this was happening.

**Mark was reading Abbie a book in the car and she said, “Daddy, this seal is driving me nuts!!”.  (She has a little plastic bath toy seal that she likes to carry around with her.)  Mark asked her why and she said, “Because he’s not looking at you!”.

**Abbie loves orange juice.  She would drink it 24/7 if given the chance.  I like to water it down when I can, but she’s caught on to that.  Mark was putting some juice in her sippy cup for her.  She brought it to him and he was dumping out the water and tried to just dump out part of the water before adding the juice.  However, Abbie was standing there supervising and when Mark didn’t dump it all out she said, “No Daddy.  Dump it all out.”  And when he did she made him let her see that there was no water left in the cup.  Unfortunately it’s hard to get anything past her these days.

**Abbie calls me her sweetie sometimes, since that’s what I call her.  Usually she’ll say, “I love you mommy.  You’re my sweetie.”  =)

** We were in the car and the song “Jar of Hearts” came on.  When we were in the States, I had this as the ringtone on my phone.  Abbie listened to the song for a bit and then she asked me if it was on the radio or if it was my phone.  I just cannot get over how she’s able to relate things at time.  That hasn’t been my ringtone for over 2 months and yet she still knew that that song was on my phone.

**Abbie calls taking pictures “taking smiles”.  She always asks if I want to take a “smile” of her or she says that she’s taking smiles of her babies.  And Abbie has called Ben “Benj” pretty much from the beginning.  She refers to him as baby Benj.

**I was nursing Ben in the living room chair (which is next to the Christmas tree) while Abbie and Mark were eating dinner.  Abbie looked over at me and said “Mom, when you’re done feeding Benj on your boob and keeping the Christmas tree company, are you going to come eat with us?”  LOL!

**Today when we were in the car to go see Mark, Abbie said to me, “Mommy, you really love Daddy, don’t you?”  I told her I did and she said, “Well it’s okay if you give him kisses then.”  Thanks to my 2 year old for giving me permission.  =)

Looking forward

The thing to do, especially in the blogger world, is to make New Year’s resolutions.  And you all know I’m all about lists, so this really is right up my alley, partially because I like to check things off my lists as I accomplish them, and partially because putting it on here is going to hold me accountable for it.  And I wouldn’t call these resolutions really, they’re more like goals I have for this year.
1.  Get Abbie potty trained.  I’ve been half-heartedly working on this and it’s not going very well at all.  This probably isn’t the best time to potty train her since she’s already adjusting to having Ben in our lives, but I KNOW she’s ready to do this and it’s just a matter of her being stubborn.  And the reason I know this is because when we took her to the nursery at church last month, she told them she had to go potty and actually peed when they took her.  I’ve been putting her in training underwear at home, trying to get her to go on her potty, but more often than not, I’ll ask her if she has to go potty, she’ll say no and leave the room and go pee in her pants and then come back with new underwear and pants and ask me to change her.  GRRRR!!!!  It’s beyond frustrating and I don’t really know how to deal with this.  Anyone have any tips??
2.  Expand on my photography skills.  I love taking pictures.  I like the challenge of trying to get the shot I’m aiming for and I like having all the photos of the kids and places and people to look back on.  I’ve been shooting mostly in manual mode lately and I feel like I have a pretty good grasp of how to get the camera to do what I want it to do, so it’s just a matter of getting faster at it and better.
3.  Be more comfortable in my own skin.  I’ve talked about this before – about how most of my friends here have a very “polished” appearance.  They have the super cute skinny jeans with the nice pair of boots, along with nice fitting shirts, accessorized with scarves and necklaces, bracelets and earrings.  Their hair almost always looks great and their make-up is perfectly done.  I, honestly, have never been like that.  Ever.  At least I don’t feel like I have.  I’m all about comfort and convenience, so put me in a pair of jeans (preferably loose fitting), and a big sweatshirt over a t-shirt, along with a pair of tennis shoes, and I’m good.  Pull my hair back in a pony tail so it’s out of my face and, on a good day, put on a little mascara, and I’m good to go.  That’s how I’m comfortable, until I get around a room full of my friends who are dressed up and “polished”.  Then I feel quite frumpy and like I don’t fit in at all.  I either need to conform and get a new wardrobe or repeatedly wear the three things that might make me fit in with the rest of them, or I need to get over it and just be comfortable with the way I am.  This one is going to require some work, and some soul searching.
4.  Spend more time on my marriage.  Mark and I have a good relationship.  I’d say we’re both pretty happy and he truly is my best friend and the person I’d rather spend time with more than anyone else.  But with that being said, I think we get complacent in our marriage sometimes.  We tend to be more like roommates than spouses and we fall into these ruts where we get so caught up in daily life that we forget about “us”.  He turns in to daddy and fighter pilot and I turn in to mommy and maid and we don’t really put any effort in to our marriage because it’s all going in to being parents, working and running the household.  Anyone that has kids knows that having 2 little ones can suck all the life out of you pretty darn quickly and when you finally get them to sleep all you want to do is crash yourself.  And while iPhones are a great things, they’re also the devil too since Mark and I both spend more time messing with our phones at night than we do talking to each other, mainly because that’s our ways of catching up on what’s going on everywhere else.  I’m going to try really hard to spend at least 30 mins a night just talking with Mark and discussing whatever, without the distraction of kids (ha, yeah right) or electronics.
5.  Get healthy.  This is my main goal for this year.  And it’s not so much about losing weight (although I definitely do want to shed a few, or 30, pounds), as it is about being fit.
This picture was taken in September of 2003.  (That’s me jumping my horse, Billy.)  I remember thinking I looked horrible in breeches (riding pants) back then and I wanted to lose weight.  What the hell was wrong with me?  I weighed a good 50+lbs less than I do now in this picture, and I was really toned from riding all the time and working at a barn teaching lessons and taking care of 30+ horses.  I want to get into this kind of shape again.  My goal is to attend at least 1 exercise class a week and to completely the Couch to 5K program.  I want to be able to run 1 mile and still be able to breathe and move the next day.  Right now I couldn’t run 1/4 of the way around a track without stopping, and quite honestly, I hate running.  There isn’t any part of it that’s fun for me, but I hear that once you can actually do it that it does become fun.  And I spent $700 on that jogging stroller, so I need to justify that purchase by actually using it for jogging.  I want to get rid of the jiggling and the wheezing when I run and to lose weight.  The good news is, 3 weeks post partum and I’m within 8lbs of my pre-pregnancy weight.  The bad news is I have a good 35-40lbs to lose to be at my goal weight.  Wish me luck!  I might need it…

Looking back

(Taken New Year’s Eve – 2010)

2011 has been an interesting year for us.  Honestly, I’m glad it’s over with.  It hasn’t been bad, necessarily, but with Mark being gone close to 9 months last year, it wasn’t easy, that’s for sure.  I’m so glad that we have a deployment under our belt – that it’s not some big unknown looming in front of us like it was this time last year.  I’m proud of us for getting through it and coming out on the other side relatively unscathed.  Deployments aren’t a big mystery to us anymore.  Now we know what they entail, how to cope with them, and most importantly, that we’re capable of surviving them.  Well, with one kid anyway.  With two kids might be a different story.

Abbie has grown up so much this year.  She went from this:

(Taken Jan 2011)

to this:

(Taken Dec 2011)

..in what seems to be the blink of an eye.  And I went from this:

(Taken March 2011)

to this:

(Taken August 2011)

to this:

(Taken Dec  2011)

to this:

(Taken Dec 2011)

I think Mark and I both grew in different ways, which I’ve touched on before.  He’s much more confident now, than he was before, and I think I’m probably more independent than I was prior to the deployment.  I think our relationship reached a different level since we spent so much time apart but were able to keep our marriage strong despite the separation.  And adding Ben to the family was obviously a huge change that we’re still adjusting too.

I’m glad 2011 is behind us and I’m very excited to see what 2012 holds for us.  I can’t wait for Ben to be a few months older to where he’s interacting more with us (and also sleeping through the night…)  And it’ll be fun to watch Abbie continue to grow and to see the relationship that she and Ben build.  And it’ll be nice to have my husband around a little more this year too!

2011 Top 5 blog posts

I love looking at the stats on my blog.  It’s really interesting to me to know what people view on my blog, how they get there, how they leave, where they’re from, etc.  I love it.

I decided to review the top 5 blog posts of the year, according to my stats.  I got this idea from my friend Jessica’s blog, except she did the top 11.  My stats don’t show me the top 10 of the year, it goes from monthly to all time, so some of the top 10 are from other years.  Oh well.  Five is enough anyway.

So here are my top 5, most reviewed, blogs for 2011.

 

5.  To my sweet daughter – My letter to Abbie for her 2nd birthday.  It’ll be fun one day to look back and have a whole bunch of these letters to remember the years gone by.  I’m glad we started this tradition.  Which reminds me, I need to do one for Ben’s birth.

4.  Girls weekend in Vegas -  Seems like this trip was a LONG time ago.  I find it funny that this is in the top 5.  I think people just search for “girls weekend in Vegas” and then decide to look at my blog when it pops up in the search results.

3.  I hate my haircut – This one REALLY cracks me up that it’s in my top 5.  Again, I think random people just google phrases so they can get a good laugh, otherwise why on earth would this one be in the top 5?  Out of all the things I wrote about this year… Really?  By the way, I still hate that haircut.  Thank God my friend Rachel fixed it while I was at home.  I like my haircut MUCH more now!

2.  Postage stamp quilt-along – This one also surprises me, but it’s fun to look back on this.  I really, really miss quilting and I wish I had more time to devote to playing with all the fabric that I have sitting downstairs on the shelf waiting for me.  I really love everything about quilting and I feel so productive when I finish a quilt.  Too bad it takes me MONTHS to finish one quilt.  Someday my kids will be grown up and I’ll have tons of time to devote to quilting, and then I’ll be wishing my kids were still the ages they are now.

1.  This summer’s bucket list – Apparently people like bucket lists.  I, personally, like any kind of list.  I did manage to do most of the things I wanted to do this summer.  There were a few things I didn’t do, and some things I wish had been on the list but weren’t, but overall, I was pretty successful with this.  And if this was a top 10 list, This summer’s bucket list (REVISED) would have been #7 on the list!

Adjusting

I’m still trying to decide if it was harder going from no kids to one kid, or from one kid to two kids.  The verdict isn’t out on that one yet.

Ben seems to be an easier baby than Abbie was.  Abbie was an exceedingly high-strung, high maintenance baby.  That paired with the facts that I had no clue what I was doing and that Mark was so busy with training he was very little to no help at all made for a pretty rough transition.  I definitely feel like I’m more in control this time around.  I know what I’m doing and I don’t freak out over everything.  I’m not worried about my milk supply or him nursing or peeing or pooping enough.  I feel like I have a pretty good handle on that side of things.  However, I never do well with sleep deprivation.  I LOVE my sleep and you just don’t get much sleep with a newborn and a 2.5 year old around so that’s hard for me.  Ben will sleep one 4-5 hour stretch at night, on a good night, but then he’s up every 30 mins to hour after that, unless I bring him to bed with me, and then he’ll sleep for another couple hours.  I usually last about 1-2 times of getting up with him every hour before I just bring him to bed with me.

Abbie has had a really rough time adjusting, which is to be expected when she’s used to being our one and only for 2.5 years and all of a sudden there’s this other little thing taking up all of my time.  The weird thing is, she’s perfectly fine with Ben.  She loves him and loves to help with him and give him kisses and hold him.  Occasionally she’ll get a little jealous when he’s nursing all the time, but other than that, she doesn’t show much resentment towards him.  She has, however, turned in to our little Jekyll and Hyde.  Normally she’s very sweet and listens as well as you can expect a 2.5 year old to listen, but then there are moments where I seriously wonder what the hell I got myself into.  Abbie wants to be in control of everything, particularly who does what for her.  And 10 times out of 10, she wants the other parent than the one that’s currently helping her.  She won’t let you change her clothes or diaper if she wants the other parent.  She won’t stay in bed, she won’t let you brush her teeth or hair or give her a bath.  It’s a full on battle, with kicking, screaming, slapping, crying, etc.  To say it’s exhausting would be a vast understatement.  Getting her to go down for a nap or to go to bed at night is a challenge.  At night, she asks Mark and I both to come in at LEAST 4 separate times to tuck her in or give her a kiss or any other excuse she can think of at the time.  If we let her keep calling, it progresses to a full on screaming fit eventually, and she doesn’t stay in her bed anymore so she’ll try to leave her room.  I know this is because she knows Ben is still out with us and she’s jealous and doesn’t want to miss anything, but I don’t know how to “fix” it.  The other day Mark tried to change her diaper to put her down for a nap, and it was World War III.  She was putting up a HUGE fight to the point where it took both of us just to get her diaper back on her.  We ended up leaving her in her room with the door shut (while watching her on the monitor) for a good 15 minutes while she threw her tantrum.  Finally she calmed down enough so we could go in, and she apologized without us prompting her too and then went right to sleep.  …???  All I can say is I’m very thankful that Mark was home for a while to help me through this phase with her.  However, he’s leaving for a few weeks in a couple weeks and I’m going to be doing this by myself for a while, and I’m honestly scared about that.  Hopefully Abbie will be mostly adjusted and Ben will be sleeping a little more than he is now (at night).  My fingers are crossed.

Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to discipline a 2 year old?  How to you respond when your child flat out tells you "no, I’m not going to do that” when you ask her to do something (or not to do something)?  Mark and I have a game plan for the full on tantrums, but just for general disciplining, what do you do?  And especially, what do you do when you’re tied down nursing a little one the majority of the day?  Any suggestions are appreciated!

Abbie’s visit with Santa

During Mark’s 10 days off for paternity leave, he was able to take Abbie to the base library for story time and a visit with Santa.  This was the first time Abbie’s really seen Santa, but she wasn’t afraid at all!  Mark said that she was completely in awe of him and that she LOVED story time.  I was bummed that I wasn’t there to witness it, but I’m so glad Mark was able to take her.  He loves doing that stuff with her and never gets the chance to because of his work hours.

Mark said that she had no hesitation going up to him and was really excited to talk to him.  She asked Santa if he was going to come to her house, although I don’t think she quite gets the theory behind that yet.  (That he brings presents.)  I think she just wanted him to come to her house.

Hopefully next year I won’t feel like I just got run over by a truck and all four of us will be able to go visit Santa together!

PS:  I’ve talked to Abbie babysitter and asked if we could switch days so I could start taking Abbie to story time on a weekly basis.  I know she loves being around the other kids and she loves going to the library, so hopefully we can work that out where I can start taking her there regularly.  Plus they have dogs at the story time that the kids can pet and Abbie loves anything to do with animals also!