Monday, July 10, 2017

Valuing relationships

Lately I have really been feeling like I put more value in certain relationships than the other parties do, and it sucks.  There are a few friendships I’ve really been feeling like I put much more value on the friendship than the other people do, and it’s a tough pill to swallow.  More often than not, I feel like I’m the one asking people to do things, or I’m the one keeping in touch with people.  The transient lifestyle of a military spouse really plays in to this.  I know most of the people in this small town have been here for years.  They all know each other and I am the outsider.  Some of them have been very accepting and welcome me in to their already well established circles, but most of them don’t.  And then there’s some that you think welcome you in but really aren’t.  Those ones hurt.  I am hoping and praying that we can grow much deeper roots in NY and that we won’t be the “outsiders” there in a few years.  That we can grow lasting friendships with people that put as much value into the relationship as we do.

(My aunt and uncle did make the trip to CO to see us and it was great to see them.  And my dad was cut off in the group picture.. He was next to Mark.)


But what sucks even more than friendships, is when you feel this vast divide with family.  We recently drove to CO to give my parents our dogs during our move.  We drove 12 hours (not including stops) with 4 kids and 3 dogs.  I asked one of my extended family to drive 4 hrs to see us so they could meet some of our kids and we could meet theirs, but they couldn’t be bothered to drive that far.  That hurts.  I would LOVE for my kids to have cousins that they could play with or see once a year or so, but we’ve never lived near anyone of our relatives that have kids.  We’ll be within driving distance of some of Mark’s cousins once we move so hopefully we can plan some meet ups with them when we live on the other side of the country.  Mark’s family seems to just plan their trips with just them.  They go to Europe together and rent lake houses together and never once suggest that we all meet in the middle to include us, or even invite us to join them in their trips.  Of course we couldn’t go to Europe with them, and we wouldn’t go all the way to where they live with 4 kids, but I feel bad that Mark’s pretty much been ostracized from his own family.  He says it doesn’t bother him and that he has his own family now, but it’s got to be a little weird for him to see them all getting together and going on trips together when he’s never even invited.


My hope is that my kids will try to keep in touch with each other when they are older – that their kids will all be friends and that they’ll be able to see each other more than once or twice a year, if that.  I am thankful for all the opportunities the military has afforded us, and all the friends we have all over the place, but it is hard to not have people physically close to you to develop deep relationships with.  And as soon as you do develop a deep relationship with someone, either you move or they move.  We are looking forward to the guard side of the military for sure.


Monday, May 22, 2017

Abbie’s 8th Birthday Party

We decided to get a bouncy house for Abbie’s 8th birthday party and have it at home.  We baked a pork shoulder and had pulled pork sandwiched and cake.  It was pretty low key and fun for the kids to have a bouncy house that took up the whole yard!  Low key birthdays are the best!




Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Mother’s Day 2017

I wanted to say these photos for the future so I thought I’d put them on here.  Mother’s Day was sweet.  The kids did a lot to make it special for me and Mark usually does.  He got me an accupressure pad thingy to lay on to help with my headaches and neck tension.  Hopefully it’ll help us both.  Abbie gave me that cup and she totally didn’t understand at all why I laughed a little when I opened it.  I think in her mind it’s just a matter of fact that she’s my favorite.  Haha!  It made me laugh so hard I was crying because of the look of confusion on her face that I would find that even remotely funny.  Makes me laugh just thinking about it.  She’s so sweet.  Benji boy make me a little questionnaire thing at school and was excited to give it to me.



My little sweetie peas was adorable as usual.  That baby is damn near perfect.


And then there was trying to get Jamison to cooperate for a .5 second photo… Good God.  I don’t know what happened to my cute smiley little boy, but he’s a hellion now.  Luckily he’s still adorable, you’d just never know because I can’t even get a decent picture of him!  Here’s the progression of trying to get a photo with 4 little kids.  For your entertainment.


Josie at 5 months


So I am way behind on my monthly updates, and am writing this when you’re over 6 months old.  Life has been crazy lately with getting the house on the market and then listing it with a realtor and the kids being home from school for the summer, but I’m finally getting my feet under me and getting around to writing a very quick update. 


You were pretty fussy this month, but that’s relatively speaking since you are generally a really happy baby.  We tried baby food for the first time with you on May 2 and you weren’t a big fan.  You haven’t lost the tongue reflex yet and just push everything out as fast as we can get it in.  But you do seem a little interested in food and like to watch other people eat.  You are drooling like crazy so I thought you might get teeth soon (but you haven’t yet).  I gave you Tylenol once on May 1 and you haven’t had it since.  You like your activity bouncer thingy, and I still shove blankets around you to keep you stable.


Your sleep is about the same.  Some nights you do great and other nights not so much.  And I moved you up to 6-9 month clothes and size 3 diapers now.

You are our little sweetie peas and we love watching you grow!

(Sorry for the picture dump.  I don’t have time to organize them all but I wanted to get them all up here!)