Tuesday, December 20, 2016

Happy 5th birthday Benji!


Oh Benji Boy.  Another year has flown by and I can’t believe you’re already 5 years old!  It seems like just yesterday you were brand new! 


This year has been quite a ride with you!  You keep me on my toes quite a bit.  You got stitches twice this year, I think, with potential for a 3rd time, and gave us a scare where we thought you had menigitis (but we were just being paranoid).  But overall, you've been pretty healthy.  You are my kiddo that gets headaches fairly frequently, which I hate, and you seem to have some seasonal allergies going on, but things usually don't slow you down too much.


I am learning so much about myself this year with parenting you.  You have my temper for sure, and we tend to bring out the worst in each other sometimes.  I know I haven't had much patience this past year, and when I get impatient with you, you are impatient with everyone, and grouchy, which in turn makes me grouchy too.  This year has been a bit rough as I don't know how to deal all of your big emotions.  And I am figuring out that you are much more emotional than Abbie was at this age.  I think you have big emotions that you can't quite articulate yet, and when that happens, you throw epic tantrums.  It can be exhausting.


Another issue is that you need wide open spaces.  You need room to run and jump and play and our tiny back yard just doesn't cut it for you.  You have so much energy you don't know what to do with it all, which causes you to cause trouble.  We got you a little indoor trampoline and you have spent HOURS in that thing.  You are pretty much half monkey in it, which is fun to watch.  You are very coordinated and I wish I had the time and energy to get you into sports.  Once we get settled in NY I plan on getting you involved in whatever sport you choose, because I think you'd love it.  You LOVE to make noise.  Anything you can beat on or pound with to get a sound, you are doing it, even if it's just your hands on a table.  You are very musical and you LOVE playing the piano.  I taught you how to play Mary Had a Little Lamb and you picked it up incredibly quickly.  I would love to get you into piano lessons as well and I think you would thrive in them.


We have been working on your self confidence this year.  You have so much self doubt and you are so hard on yourself when you mess up.  Your insecurities worry us and make us parent you much differently than we do Abbie, who definitely doesn't have any insecurities yet.  You get very offended when anyone laughs if you mess something up and you start screaming.  But you also respond very well to positive reinforcement.  Sometimes I feel like I spend all day getting on to you about making messes or being noisy or doing things you shouldn't do.  I wonder if I have too high of expectations for you as I don't have any other experience with boys.  I didn't grow up with brothers or male relatives around much, so I don't know what's "normal" and what's not, and you are teaching me.  We had a while at the end of this year where we thought you might have ADD but after looking into it more, I don't think you have it at all.  We talked to a psychologist about it and she didn't think you had it either.  You are just an active little boy that needs space to explore and do your thing.


You love to play with legos and Lincoln Logs.  You love riding your bike and anything to do with water.  We got you magnatiles recently and you have lots of fun with those.  You love to wear your flight suits and your daddy is still your hero by a long shot.  You LOVE spending time with daddy.  You love rough housing with him and you love snuggling with him.  Often times I wish I had the bond with you that you have with daddy, but I also am so glad you connect with him so well.


You have a few chores that are have mastered.  You empty the silverware from the dish washer and this year I taught you how to put away your laundry after I've folded it.  You know most of your letters and know about 50 sight words.  You are learning to read and can write your name.  You can count to 20 easily and are doing simple addition and subtraction.  I really wish we could have gotten you in to TK this year because you would do great in it.  You are a smart little guy and you catch on to concepts very easily.  You have a huge interest in space and movement and I think you are going to have the scientific mind just like your daddy does.  Your favorite thing to do ever is to go camping.


You are currently in size 6 clothing- mostly for length and you wear size 13.5 shoes.  You still wear diapers at night because you sleep like a rock and I'm not ready to try to do the whole potty training at night thing.  We've tried it before and you just aren't ready so I'm not going to worry about it.  Sometimes if you fall asleep during quiet time you will pee the bed if I haven't made you go potty right before you fall asleep so you just sleep too deeply right now.  You love mac n cheese and chicken nuggets and sometimes you like cheeseburgers, but you're funny about most other things.  You go through stages where you like things and then don't like things.  Usually you are pretty good about eating when we put in front of you.


You have a love/hate relationship with both Abbie and J right now.  J wants to do everything you are doing, which can be hard because he usually gets in the way of your plans.  J usually wants whatever toy you have and will just stand there are scream if he doesn't get it.  You are able to hold your own with Abbie now and are getting better about walking away when she bugging you.  Sometimes you play really well together too.


You have matured so much this year.  We've definitely had our peaks and valleys throughout the year, and I find that I regret how I handle you more often than not.  But I hope you know how fiercely I love you and how much I worry about your happiness and well-being.  You are my sweet little Benji boy who's so eager to please, but who's also sensitive.  I don't know what I'd ever do without you.  I can't wait to see where the next year takes us.  I love you!!







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