Friday, March 20, 2009

I want off this rollercoaster...

So after a week of being fairly optimistic about Mark being done with training, today that was not-so-much the case. He was supposed to have a sim in the morning and a flight in the afternoon. However, he got bumped out of his flight (for the 3rd or 4th time) so another guy in his class could fly since the other guys jet broke when he was supposed to fly in the morning. This didn't piss me off until I found out that every other person in Mark's class flew, except for him. I thought his commander said Mark was supposed to be priority? Obviously that's not really the case.

In other words, we're back to being fairly certain Mark's not going to make it home for the shower. I'm ready to throw in the towel and say screw it all. I'm tired of dealing with all these changes and I'm very close to my breaking point. I just want to cancel the whole shower (and we might end up doing that) and take the cats to my parents in St. Louis when they're there next weekend. If Mark would let me drive home by myself for the shower (with the animals), I might consider that, but he refuses to even entertain that option, and I really don't want to have my mom fly down here so she can babysit me on the ride home. I'm pregnant. I'm not dying or disabled. I'm perfectly capable of driving myself home, but at this point I'd like to just crawl in a hole and stay there for approximately the next 2 months. Besides, if by chance Mark is done by next Friday, I don't want to waste our money, or my parents money, by buying a plane ticket for my mom to fly down to drive back with me if it's not necessary. We also don't know if we should stick to the original plan of having our stuff packed up next Monday and Tuesday (which the movers are already scheduled for) or to push that back a week. There's too many choices and changes and I absolutely give up on trying to figure it all out. I'm done. I'm throwing in the towel. And I want off.

3 comments:

Brittany said...

Hey Sweetie... keep your head up. You have every right to be upset and want off at this point. I understand your frustrations, we have them over on this side too, and one day they will all be over and we will live to tell the tales. You can always call and I will let you tell me all about your frustrations and you can say whatever and I will still love you! You are an amazing person and I know you are going to be a great mom! I wish I could give you a big hug. Miss you,
Britt

Lynne said...

How soon is your shower again? I am sure things will work out and Mark will be able to come with you. He just has to! Keep your chin up, we're thinking about you back here!

Cathy said...

Hey Monica,
I am so sorry to hear this I've been praying that things work out for you and I will continue to do so and hopefully things will work themselves out just don't throw in the towel just yet hang in there! I really hope things work out and keep us posted